pca logo.jpeg

almost blue

one of my family members has developed lung cancer and it is no longer treatable. it is no longer a matter of what, it is more a matter of when. how soon might even be a more accurate question.

loss of friends and families to nature continues to befuddle me. i lost my very best friend when i was 27 with quite a few following him. i lost my grandmother and grandfather shortly thereafter. all during that time i was expecting to walk the plank myself.  now i am not quite so  traumatized by the cycle of life, but i am sad.

my relative used to live in idaho springs and i would visit he and his wife with some regularity. i always cooked decadent meals for them because i liked the practice and i loved spoiling them. selfishly i liked to practice the dishes too. over the last 15 years we became quite connected. we even watched the south park movie and i lovingly have referred to him as uncle fucker ever since.

they moved away last year so he could be closer to a treatment option. i don’t know that i will see him again before he goes. somehow being aware that he knows how i feel and i know how he feels does not dilute the sadness very much.

a bonus here is finding comfort in sorrow. i mean in feeling. my life and my heart did not have room nor time to notice or experience true feelings such as this. there is definitely some grace in not running. emotional sobriey- i don’t know. but emotion ? certainly.

#death #emotionalsobriety #grief #recovery #loss

0 views

Tag Us #PCACO

About

Since 2015, PCA has consistently provided CCAR Recovery Coach Training and Education.  The focus is  always on the individual. The  goal of the Recovery Coach Professional (RCP) is to help individuals, reach their full potential in recovery. 

Read More...

Services

Recovery Coach Trainings

1VOZ-Bilingual Telephone Support

El Paso County RECO 

RECO Pueblo

Chain Breakers Mesa County

Don't Look Back Center 

RCO Development

And More

Copyright © Embark/PCA Colorado 2020, All Rights Reserved

Designed By:

kinedic_media_logo_2020.png